When Music Meets the Moment: How Country Songs Hold Space for Staying — and for Loss
Sometimes music doesn’t just entertain. Sometimes it intervenes.
The show took place on December 6, 2025, at Madison Theater in Covington, Kentucky, as a Toys for Tots benefit presented by B-105.1.
reflecting the impact of Parmalee’s music
on fans struggling with mental health.
I didn’t walk into the building that night to cover a show. I walked in trying to let go of the weight December always carries for me — the holidays, the memories, the kind of grief that never fully leaves. Three days later would mark the forty-second anniversary of my father’s suicide. December has never let me forget.
The night carried another layer of meaning. Toys for Tots is led by the United States Marine Corps, providing toys to children and families facing hardship during the holidays. That mattered to me personally. My father was a United States Marine Corps veteran who served during both the Korean and Vietnam wars. Long before I understood music as a lifeline, I understood service — and the quiet weight that often comes with it.
Before the lights went down, before Parmalee took the stage, I met Amanda. She had arrived early for the meet and greet and was excited to bring her niece to her very first Parmalee concert. We talked casually — about the show, about the music, about sharing moments like this with someone younger. At the time, neither of us knew how heavy the night would become.
The timing of meeting Amanda hit me harder than I expected. We spoke before the music started, before the crowd filled in, before the lyrics landed. She had been struggling silently with her mental health for months, fighting to keep going when everything in her felt heavy and uncertain. Days later, I would be standing in the shadow of the anniversary of my father’s death. Meeting Amanda — someone who had fought to stay — on the eve of remembering someone who couldn’t, felt like music gently tapping me on the shoulder, insisting I pay attention.
“Music Means a Profound Emotional Connection”
After the show, Amanda shared how deeply music has shaped her ability to keep going.
“Music means a profound emotional connection, identity reflection and memory triggers and a little bit of community building. It serves as a universal language for things like joy, sorrow, relaxation, motivation and importantly helping people understand themselves and connect with others, process experiences and sometimes help find solace when words fail. I connected to Parmalee’s music when they first came out with Carolina but really connected when Just the Way came out featuring Blanco Brown. I loved how that song reminded women we are beautiful no matter what. I connected to Chase Matthew when I heard his song Born For This and that song hit me in a different way because I know what it’s like when people tell you, your whole life, that you’re never going to be good enough.”
“Girl, He Don’t Make Mistakes”
One song, in particular, became a turning point for her — Parmalee’s Just the Way.
“When Just the Way came out I loved how positive it was towards us women. The one verse that really hit me is ‘I love you just the way God made you / Girl, He don’t make mistakes.’ Hearing it live at the Toys for Tots show in Covington really hit me in the heart because I decided that I would no longer speak negatively about myself. That verse is my reminder that God made me in His eyes and I shouldn’t question how He made me. I am beautiful no matter what people say about me.”
For Amanda, music didn’t just resonate emotionally — it became a coping mechanism during a season when she struggled to say out loud what she was carrying.
“Music really started becoming my coping mechanism ten months ago. Music helps speak the words I can’t say myself. There are songs that literally explained what I was going through but I didn’t know how to tell people because I silenced myself from being a burden to others. I wish people understood that we are all wired to struggle emotionally because we are programmed to survive in this harsh world rather than to be happy. Some struggles aren’t visible. Just because someone seems ‘fine’ doesn’t mean they’re not struggling.”
She described the moment a lyric finally cut through.
“The moment I knew to keep going was when Chase Matthew sang ‘people always told me I’m not good enough, but I know I’m good enough.’ I was like dang he’s right. I’ve heard that song 100 times and I finally understood what he meant by that. So I fought to get better.”
“Love Hard”
After the Covington show, Amanda spoke with Parmalee tour manager David Schultz. A small gesture became something she says she will carry with her.
“When David gave me that bracelet after telling Parmalee how much their song was my anthem to get better and I literally about broke down in tears. Because I ALWAYS love hard even when people don’t deserve it. I still do it because I try and still see the good in people. It reminds me I have a good heart. And I should try and love others in my own way. To love them from a distance even when they don’t belong on my journey.”
Schultz later shared his perspective with Country Entertainment News.
“Amanda shared a very sentimental story about how the band’s music saved her life and how much that meant to her. Earlier that week I had gone through an emotional time and it led me to make some fun bracelets as an outlet. I made one that said ‘Love Hard’ as a reminder to whoever had it to not be afraid to care a lot or experience their emotions in strong ways. And I could tell that music was that love for her. So I said, ‘Hey, I have something for you.’ And I gave her the bracelet. And seeing her reaction honestly meant the world to me. It was a positive reward for putting love into the world. And sometimes that’s all people need. And sometimes that can also be the difference.”
He added:
“We do what we do because we love it. And everyone we work with has an emotional connection to the music. So hearing fans share their stories helps remind us that what we do really matters to a lot of people.”
Holding Space for Grief
On November 21, 2025, Parmalee released How Do I Let You Go, a song centered on grief and the impossible task of learning how to live with someone who should still be here.
How do I say goodbye
How do I let you go
The song moves through anger, confusion, and the guilt that creeps in when the world keeps spinning anyway.
“Sometimes I just get angry / I don’t even know at what.”
By the time the chorus returns — “How do I say goodbye / How do I let you go” — it’s clear the song isn’t asking for instructions. It’s acknowledging that there may never be an answer. That night in December, the weight of those words sat quietly alongside Just the Way — one song affirming worth, the other acknowledging loss. Together, they framed the full spectrum of survival: learning to love yourself enough to stay, and learning how to live with the people who didn’t.
When Songs Say the Quiet Part Out Loud
While songs like Just the Way offer affirmation and How Do I Let You Go sits within grief, “Cobain” — written by Jay Webb and Eddie Eberle (of Eddie and the Getaway) — occupies a different, more uncomfortable space. It doesn’t offer reassurance. Instead, it names the thought patterns that exist before someone ever asks for help.
In previous interviews with Country Entertainment News, both Webb and Eberle spoke about writing the song from a place of emotional honesty rather than resolution.
Jay Webb said:
“We never talked about exactly what the goal was for the song. We just both had this understanding of mental health and what we kind of wanted the song to represent for everybody.”
He added:
“That song, to us, I feel like means the world because of how many people it’s helped, and every night somebody comes up crying about ‘Cobain’ and what it means to them.”
Eddie Eberle shared the real-world impact of hearing that connection echoed back.
“Last night I had a dude who served in the military for twenty-two years — he was a captain — and he came up to me and said, ‘I was going to commit suicide the day I heard your song Cobain. I had a nine millimeter to my head… and I decided not to kill myself that day.’”
He continued:
“I feel like it’s almost my job to have music to connect with people and let them know they’re not the only ones out there that felt like that.”
Music doesn’t fix everything. It doesn’t erase grief, and it doesn’t guarantee outcomes. But sometimes it creates a pause — long enough for someone to breathe, long enough to feel seen, long enough to stay.
On December 6, music helped one woman choose to keep going. Days later, I stood in the space left by someone who couldn’t. Both truths exist at the same time. That’s the reality of mental health. And it’s the reality country music keeps showing up for — whether through affirmation, confrontation, or simply saying the quiet parts out loud.
Sometimes a song is just a song. And sometimes, it’s a lifeline.
Amanda shared a final reflection:
“I am proud of myself for fighting my mental health. Ten months ago I could have just ended it. But I somehow found the strength to keep fighting. I asked for help. I realized who I needed in my life to help me become the woman I’ve been dying to become.
One thing I’m looking forward to is being more present for myself. For my mental peace. Making memories with my friends and family. Putting God first.
If someone is reading this, I want them to know it’s okay to not be okay. I overcame my anxiety that literally controlled my life. You have to open your eyes and realize who is in your corner and who wants to see you succeed. Your story isn’t over yet. There is hope in front of you.”
Resources
If you or someone you know is struggling, help is available.
- United States: Call or text 988, the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, available 24/7
- International: Visit findahelpline.com for resources worldwide
- National Alliance on Mental Health
If you’re in immediate danger, call your local emergency number. If you’re struggling but not in crisis, consider reaching out to a trusted friend, family member, faith leader, or mental health professional.
